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FLIP FLOP NATION: An Essay

by xratedtimes@yahoo.com

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As spring is here in all its glory (for the Northern Hemisphere, anyway), it’s time to take a moment to reflect on one of the greatest gifts the heavens could have bestowed upon the male foot lover:

The flipflop.

I know you’re nodding your head in lusty agreement! I’d like to take a moment to talk about this wonderful bit of footwear, onomatopoetically named for the sound it makes, so minimal it’s almost not there, its story and how it affects guys like you and me–guys that admire the male foot.

First, a bit of history. For you younger guys, you may not recall the 1980s or 1970s very well. Let me paint you a picture. As men’s clothing trends went in and out during those years, one thing stayed pretty much hidden–men’s feet. There seemed to be some unspoken, but omnipresent rule that a man’s foot should was horrible and ugly and should be covered at pretty much all times, except maybe when at a beach or pool, in bed, or while bathing.

The seventies were big on clunky, heavy dress shoes in colder weather and lightweight tennis shoes when it was warm. The eighties gave foot fanciers a slight thrill–deck shoes (‘topsiders’) and penny loafers came in style and were practically a uniform. They were year-round shoes, but in warm weather their wearers would typically go sockless, causing our pulse rates to spoke when cute preppy guys would slip them off and air out their feet–but those wonderful peep shows were few and far between.

(Necessary to mention is the horrible, omnipresent Birkenstock; this ‘Jesus sandal’ has been around since the sixties, but always has been relegated to scary, granola hippie types–who often wear them with socks--that no one would ever look at anyway).

Most of the1990s weren’t much better shoe-wise, with the styles changing (brogues, construction boots, bucks, and wingtips in winter, Sketchers and Airwalks tennis shoes in summer) but still the beautiful male foot was hidden from view–even in eternally beachy areas like LA and Miami.

Then, IT happened. Some time near the end of the millennium, the lowly flipflop (‘thong’, to those of you in Canada) made a reappearance in men’s closets. Within a year or two, every US high school and college student, as well as guys well into their forties, owned and wore them with a vengeance, with many guys wearing nothing else on their feet during the warm months–including all the guys that previously would have called men showing off their feet “queer” or “gross”. Preppies and jocks, neo-hippies and rockers, squares and “Abercrombie” types (a preppy-jock-vaguely gay clone that’s appeared in recent years, named after the American clothing store), skaters and surfers, gays and straights and “metrosexuals” all love their flip flops.

Once relegated to the beach, the pool, and for showering in unfamiliar stalls, flip flops aren’t just for the most casual of men’s outings anymore, either...they are now paired with shorts, jeans for hanging out and khakhis and slacks for going out. Once unthinkable, flipflops are even being seen at nightclubs and on dance floors. It seems now that only the most formal outfits and events are off-limits to them.

The humble rubber flipflop, which many of us remember being poorly-made, not terribly comfortable, and costing 99 cents at the drugstore, has blossomed into every imaginable style, material, color–and price. They are now so well made that they can live to see another season–unlike their drugstore ancestors, that typically fell apart after a few weeks..

This begs the question: why are flip flops now so wildly popular among men?

I think it’s pretty obvious. Men have finally discovered and accepted something that women have known for centuries: the foot is sexy. Not only, obviously, does it feel better in warm and hot weather to have nearly nothing on your feet, but having that much more of your body (especially a body part that typically is hidden) suddenly visible is very sexy. In the summer it allows that much more tanned skin to show. Straight guys have realized that women do look. They’ve even seemed to accept that other guys look. Gay guys have known it for a bit longer, of course!

I’ve conducted my own unofficial research on the subject of men and flip flops. I travel often, but currently live in a mid-sized Northern California town. The weather is either warm or hot from April to October, with high temperatures in July and August typically over 100. Just like nearly everywhere else in the country, the guys here love their flip flops–and I love that they love them!

I have paid very close attention (as close as possible without getting my ass kicked!) to straight men’s behavior when they’re wearing flip flops. I have watched them curl their toes, seductively slide their feet in and out, and even step out of their flip flops and stand on them. The straightest, butchest guys let their flip flops dangle and fall off–even when they’re in the company of other guys! They wear ankle bracelets and get ankle tattoos–all designed to direct the eye towards their feet. Almost like six-pack abs or big biceps, guys are realizing that nice feet are worthy of being shown off. There seems to be an overall vague air of sexiness around a guy wearing flip flops; even the guy himself doesn’t seem to fully understand it.

Of course, for guys like us that worship the naked male foot, warm weather in flip flop country is a combination blessing and a curse! Every hot guy from 14 to 50 is flip-flopping past you and you’re trying to keep your cool. Gone are the days when you’d have to wonder “Gee, that’s guy’s cute...I wonder if his feet are too?”. Just look down, and your lusty question is answered! More than once have I almost walked into walls, supermarket displays, or other pedestrians while I was taking in such a view!

So, in closing, I’d like to say that, while unclear exactly who is responsible for the undeniable flip flop mania in the USA, it seems that every type of man has rediscovered the sensual flesh below his ankles, and the perfect footwear to show it off.

All hail Flip Flop Nation!